Lucky Grafenberg

What do you wish they would do to you? Tell Rachael at [email protected].

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Whoever said the G-spot is an urban legend is a jerkoff. It's there, in full effect, and deserves glowing attention. So, find it.

A good friend told me her orgasms rely on hard sex that deeply penetrates-so her G-spot, named for Ernst Grafenberg, gets stimulated. Another friend said more or less the same thing. Both used words along the lines of "needing to get fucked." Of course I had no clue what they were talking about. But their whole reasoning for this was so their G-spots were attended to.

As great as that sort of sex may be, there are other, more target-specific methods. And boys-don't think you get to sit this one out. You totally know you have G-spots, too.

When girls are turned on, our G-spots swell to a sort of spongy bump. It's located behind the front wall of the vagina-not on it. So, sensibly, deliberate pressure is recommended. You'll have a much better time finding it if you warm us up first. If you can't find the little bump, it probably means its owner isn't aroused, in which case you need to step up.

Let's pretend you find it. Those erotic 10 fingers are wonderfully efficient tools for the job. Move a few in a "come here" motion, like you're trying to pull her G-spot out.

And there's no need to stop there. Lick us wherever you want as you do this. Certain finger arrangements will leave the thumb in a perfect position to gently rub the clitoris, as well.

Sex with enough angle and pressure to awaken our G-spot is a most welcome activity, be it with a strap-on or penis. The intercourse colloquially called "doggie-style" works quite nicely if it's done right.

Another activity you might try if you are using a penis to penetrate us is tensing your Kegel muscle-the muscle that cuts your urine flow. The tensing slightly angles your penis upwards, making it more likely to rub our G-spot if you're rocking out on top, missionary style. Watch your appeal go through the roof. Set us on top of you, so we can expertly angle ourselves, and you can watch.

And how do you know if you've found it?

"Yes, yes! Right there, that's perfect! Don't stop!"

That's how you know.

And we ladies are not alone.

"I am a more or less straight guy, and I can tell you that to be anally stimulated with a vibrator is incredible. I had a girlfriend use one on me, and it was one of the best orgasms I have ever had. A small vibrator used to stimulate the prostate properly-with lots of lube-combined with oral sex is nothing short of ecstasy."

He's talking about his G-spot.

For guys, the G-spot is accessible via backdoor penetration-the anus. I'm sure most of you knew this.

Now, many straight guys have a problem with this. And as much as I'd devote a whole column explaining to you why it's okay to chill out and enjoy some great orgasms through anal penetration (think continuous ejaculating-not squirts), I only get Tuesdays. So here's what I suggest for the boys who have never dealt with anal penetration, gay or straight: Check it out alone. When you simply adjust to the idea, you can experiment with someone else and see if you like it.

A nice introductory session for ladies or gentlemen experimenting with their sexy guy: Take your well-lubricated finger and slide it slowly up your man's anus. Find the spot that feels like a chestnut. Let your finger just rest there for a bit so he can adjust to the sensation. Maybe lick or suck his testicles to relax him. Then, gently but firmly, rub the spot in a downward motion. Or move your finger from side to side, like 11 o'clock to 1 o'clock. And take advantage of your free hand. No reason to stop licking and sucking. If you're in the pleasing mode, why not go all-out?

Much of what works for girls works for guys. Start gently. You're dealing with a highly sensitive area. Take care, and as usual, watch for signals. Some women and a lot of men won't want you doing this at all. Fine. Guess whose G-spot will get more attention: yours.


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