Finger Lickin' Good

Emily Chung knows what she wants for her 21st birthday this week. Send her sexy questions at [email protected]

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Ladies, don't worry, I did not forget about you! Last week, I concentrated on pleasing those men out there. This week, I am here to help you out with a lesson on cunnilingus, or "eating a girl out," "going down on a girl," whatever you want to call it. Personally, I think cunnilingus is definitely something men and women can use a little nitty gritty, womanly advice about.

Let us begin with the basics of a woman's vulva area. Rocket science is not required to figure out the erogenous zones of a woman's vaginal area. Just take minute to have a look-see. Take the clitoris, which is covered by a flap of skin called the clitoral head. That region is the most sensitive region on a woman's body, but be careful not to be too rough on it! Not all women like direct, rough contact, so be tender and sweet with that pearl. Below the clitoris are the vaginal lips, or labia that encompass the vaginal opening. The labia are also very sensitive but can be a bit more durable. During oral sex, it's often recommended to spread them slightly apart to get down to the juicy business.

Just some general advice to follow when going down on a woman: don't just dig your face in her crotch and think that will get her off. Delicacy is in order here. Before you just stick your tongue in her vagina, try a little foreplay and teasing. That will help get her nicely lubricated and aroused. But first off, don't go on with a dry tongue. Collect some saliva on your tongue to add extra lubrication. Then gently lick and kiss the lips and inner thigh areas, just to start getting her aroused. As for any saliva that collects, don't feel like you need to swallow it - instead, use it to both your advantages by letting it dribble about on her vagina.

The power of your tongue is a wondrous thing. Some ladies enjoy a firm, long tongue that offers direct and strong pleasure to her clit or vagina, but others like the softness a rounded tongue offers. Try licking your hand while varying your tongue tension to feel it yourself. Knowing how to work that tongue will give her endless rapture. But keep in mind that since your tongue can only reach so far into the vagina, tongue insertion alone may not bring her the pleasure she desires.

OK, now for the specific techniques that I know you've all been waiting for. Women will greatly differ in what feels good to them. What works for one woman may not work for another, plus, depending on her arousal or even on where she is in her menstrual cycle, she may also change day by day in what she enjoys. So here are some various tricks to try. A simple and traditional method is just moving your tongue around on her clit, either back and forth or up and down. You can accomplish this by shaking your head about, or just wiggling your tongue, but that can get tiring. Tracing the alphabet with your tongue breaks some of the monotony of simply stroking the tongue on the clitoris. Plus, you can also give her a hummer, technically speaking. The sensation of humming while your lips are on the clitoris can be very intense and unusual.

But the clit can be played with in so many more ways. For instance, try gently exposing the clit more by moving the hood of skin off of it. Now you'll have direct contact for more intense reactions. You can then lick and nibble the sides and lower aspect of the clit (the shaft). Next, try sucking on the clit. Purse your lips around the clit and tenderly suck and play with it, perhaps flicking your tongue on it at times. Another intriguing technique is only for those of you who are blessed with the ability to curl your tongue - curl your tongue, put the clit in the curl and begin giving a mini-blow job to it.

Insert a small ice cube into her vagina to change the temperature. But be careful not to pick a large one, because that can cause frostbite. Or, blow lightly with your breath on her vaginal area, but avoid blowing directly into the vagina. Experiment with speed, pressure and movement during cunnilingus to find out what your partner will like.

With any type of licking, sucking or slurping, an enhancing element in oral play is adding the finger factor. Inserting a finger or two into the vagina adds another flavor to the game. Some women enjoy just the feeling of an object in the vagina while oral sex is occurring, and some really like the sensations of thrusting in and out, while others still like a little bit of pressure on the rectum, or gentle insertion into the anus (but wash that finger before it goes into any other orifice!). With any of these tactics, it's important to talk to your partner.

A common concern for performers is smell and taste. If your lady happens to have that "not so fresh feeling" or smell you don't enjoy, don't fret! It can be easily and pleasurably adjusted. Consider taking a bath or shower with your partner as a nice bit of foreplay. Or, if that doesn't work, a barrier for protection against STDs can then serve a double duty. Many people find dental dams and lollies (flat latex sheets placed against the vulva during oral sex) to be too much work and frustrating. But another, thinner alternative is saran wrap. With saran wrap, not only can you protect yourself against STDs, but you can also wrap your partner up in it for hands-free enjoyment. Just try to avoid the microwaveable types because they have larger pores.

As a final little side note, I'd like to mention a gathering of a group

of Bondage Dominance Sadism and Masochism friendly individuals, brought to my attention by a reader. There will be a "munch" reception for anyone who is interested in meeting others who participate in BDSM on Oct. 9 at Pyramid Brewery at 7 p.m. I was assured that there will be no playing involved, but lots of fun people to meet. I encourage anyone curious to check it out and look out for a future column dedicated to BDSM.


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